Prime Ministers, football coaches, CEOs… All experience a honeymoon period in the first weeks and months…

Amber’s first CEO gig. Her name was on the door. The stakes felt big, and her first weeks were fabulous! She was welcomed by the board, staff across the organisation were enthusiastic, and leaders responded well. In her first fortnight she was delighted by the level of cohesiveness of the executive team and positively surprised by the support from one executive in particular who she knew had applied for the CEO role.

My first coaching session with Amber was at week six. She was taking me through the status with her leadership team. Cracks had started to appear in the team collegiality. She was unsure which executives she could trust to talk through possible changes to the structure. The Chief People Officer had excellent corporate and sector knowledge but lacked the contemporary approach Amber was looking for. Her biggest challenge was how to build a working relationship with one executive who had applied for the CEO role, and whose initial support of Amber was fading rapidly.

She rattled off the challenges, and then sat quietly for a moment. Then she grimaced, saying ‘so the honeymoon’s over, right?’.

I sat with her in silence for a moment. Then asked, ‘so what meaning do you give that?’

She didn’t answer straight away. Sometimes you decide the honeymoon’s over. Sometimes it’s decided for you… By an executive who stops pretending, a crack that stops being ignorable.

Honeymoons aren’t meant to last. And the end marks the moment you stop being welcomed into the role and start building the team you actually need.

If you’re feeling that shift, it doesn’t mean you’re failing. It may mean you’re beginning to see the role (and the team) more clearly.

One question to take into your week: what’s one thing you’ve been hoping would sort itself out, the thing that’s yours to lead?

Go Fearlessly – Corrinne

PS You don’t need to be a CEO for this to be true. New team, new role, new project — the stakes are smaller, but the pattern’s the same. The welcome ends. The real work starts.