Years ago I heard the tail end of a radio interview with parenting expert Michael Grose. He said something that resonated with me and I have referenced ever since…

‘The welfare of the family is more important than the welfare of any one child.’

When I am working with teams, a key guiding principle is that the welfare of the team is more important than the welfare of any one team member.

Indicators that this balance might be skewed can include:

  • One member of the team goes on holidays and the whole team dynamic lifts.
  • Meetings focus more on personal agendas than shared agendas.
  • One person in your team takes up more of your time and/or energy than the rest put together.
  • Your focus is less on developing the team and more on performance development of individuals.

Might this be happening in your team? If you are nodding while you read this, ask yourself:

  • What else is being overlooked while you focus is on one ‘problem child’?
  • What conversations are not being had?
  • What decisions are being avoided?
  • What is best for the team right now?
  • How can you empower the rest of the ‘family’ to support this team member?
  • What would you do if you had more courage?

Developing ‘team agreements’ – broad protocols about how we commit to operate together as a team – can be a good place to start.

Time to put the welfare of the team first.


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